Me and a Model

Before last week, I had absolutely nothing in common with Gisele Bundchen. Actually, I kind of really disliked her.

Gisele was the leggy model who stepped into NFL Football star Tom Brady’s life when his former girlfriend, Bridget Moynahan was still pregnant. Gisele postured and posed after her boyfriend’s son was born and made very incendiary proclamations about how she loved the child “like her own.”

She and the NFL lothario got married and now have another baby. She then came under fire for proclaiming that childbirth was not the god-awful painful endurance that most women have believed it to be.

She said, “It wasn’t painful, not even a little bit. The whole time, my head was so focused—every contraction, the baby is closer, the baby is closer. So, it wasn’t like, ‘Oh, what pain.’ It was, ‘With every contraction, he is getting closer to me.’ I wanted to be conscious and present for what was happening ... I didn’t want to be anesthetized. I wanted to feel. The second day, I was walking, I was washing dishes, I was making pancakes in the kitchen.”

Reading her quotes was a bit unsettling, because all of a sudden, I have something in common with this freak of nature model who I had previously considered an insensitive interloper.

You see, I have always maintained (to mostly disbelieving audiences) that my experience during childbirth was (while not completely pain free) a really satisfying and exhilarating experience. Yes, it was hard work. Yes, there were some moments during it when I asked if I could take a break and finish later. But, I was an awake, alert and active participant in the birth of my daughter.

Just recently, Gisele exposed herself to more criticism when she stated in an interview that there should be a law that required new Moms to breastfeed their infants for at least 6 months.

The backlash and increased hatred towards her was immediate.

While a law for women to breastfeed for 6 months is certainly unreasonable and unconstitutional, I am now an unlikely ally of a widely disliked supermodel. (***Sigh***)

Because I kind of get where she is coming from.

First I will say that breastfeeding is not the easiest thing – it is a ‘learned art.’ Manipulating an infant’s tiny, searching and impatient lips into the “correct” position on your swollen, sensitive nipples within hours or minutes after delivery is just the first challenge. Continuing down the path of exclusive nursing is yet another.

It requires perseverance, patience and dedication to the goal of breastfeeding. But, once you hit 6 weeks, you are in the groove…in the ‘honeymoon’ phase. For some reason, nursing is pretty much seamless after that time mark and you and your infant become a nursing couple.

Obviously, I breastfed Taylor. It was more of a destiny than a choice.

My own Mother bucked the norm in 1969 and not only had her husband in the delivery room when I was born (during a natural childbirth,) but also chose to breastfeed. (Yes, my parents were wanna-be hippies)

My Mother went on to have 5 daughters. 3 were “homegrown” and 2 were adopted.

Mom decided when she was going through the adoption process for her 4th daughter, who she mistakenly thought would be her last, that she wanted to breastfeed. Just as she had successfully done before.

During the excruciating and invasive adoption process, she used a breast pump to reawaken her body’s reflexes. By the time our family welcomed 3 month old Lara into our home, Mom had successfully gotten about 50% of her milk supply to come in.

Baby Lara became part of our family, and Mom breastfed her with the assistance of the Supplemental Nursing System (SNS).

3 months later, my Mom learned that Lara’s birthmother was pregnant again, and requested that the new unborn child be placed in the same family as the first.

It took about 5 minutes of discussion between my parents. They wanted this newborn – who would be blood related to the daughter they already called their own.

After Lydia (the 5th sister) was born, my Mother then tandem nursed two babies, who had not been born of her body.

So of course, when I birthed my own baby…there was no question. - I would breastfeed.

My nursing experience was 22 months in length and not without challenges. But, I look back and am so grateful.

When I went to Taylor’s pediatrician’s office for her first illness, he commented on the fact that her file was so slim. She was a stranger to the doctor’s office…a robust and healthy 3 year old. (I quietly and secretively attribute this to breastfeeding.)

When I went to a birthday party for one of her friends when she was 6…I casually polled the other Moms, whose children were all in the Gifted program – they all had breastfed. I felt momentarily vindicated.

Now that Taylor is 14, and I am far removed from baby discussions…I get way less validations that my choice to breastfeed was right.

I look back at Gisele. She is a model, a Mom and she breastfeeds and she is outspoken about it.

While her sound bites may be incendiary, I applaud her and her convictions. I myself have had friendships challenged due to my convictions on the subject.

May every baby just get a moment at the breast.

Happy Breastfeeding Month